Former US Navy SEAL Invents Most Badass Drinking Accessory on the Market

Former United States Navy SEAL Eli Crane and his wife Jen recently appeared on ABC’s Shark Tank, pitching Bottle Breacher.  Knowing that he needed a way to provide for his family after his tours of duty, Eli developed a one-of-a-kind bottle opener using recycled .50 caliber bullets while deployed.  For those who don’t know how freakishly big .50 caliber ammo is, imagine solid brass bullets the size of your TV remote being shot out of a helicopter. 

After only launching just over one year ago, the Crane’s have found that financial stability to the tune of over $500,000 in net sales.  They project to finish the year at $840,000 after just locking in $100,000 revenue in a single month.  Perhaps greatest of all, every Bottle Breacher is hand crafted by active duty service members, reservists and veterans.

            Eli served 9 years in the Navy, undertaking 3 combat deployments in Iraq.  During his first attempt at Navy SEAL training at BUDS (Basic Underwater Demolition SEAL), Eli successfully endured Hell Week – five days of no sleep, minimal food, and rigorous maritime training.  A few days later, Eli was brought into an office and told that although his heart bared no flaw, he was not among the best of the best.  With that, he was transferred onto a Naval fleet and spent two and a half years on the ship, before returning to BUDS and graduating the SEAL program.  Eli Crane put the ethic that every American should aspire to have into two sentences:

“Life is full of obstacles and failures, and when we face that, we don’t run for the hills.  We just keep charging on and figure it out.”

It’s a breath of fresh air to see a humble, gritty, model American find success on scale that has barely been tipped yet.  There is an endless market for Bottle Breacher, as every man who freely walks this American soil owes it to men like Eli Crane to invest in.  Whether you want it personally engraved, for corporate and promotional purposes, or as groomsmen’s gifts, purchase your own Bottle Breacher at  www.BottleBreacher.com or www.etsy.com/shop/BottleBreacher. 

Evan Farrar

Taylor Swift’s Album “1989” Might be the Last to Ever Go Platinum and You Should Feel Like a Bad Person

   

  Country music’s (former) sweetheart, Taylor Swift, has already become one of the most recognizable names in music history at only 24 years old.  With her recent move from Nashville to New York before the release of her latest album, 1989, Taylor has caught some flack for her genre alteration.  Changing from folk style country to an urban pop tone, Taylor’s album was sure to turn heads – just not at the rate it has been.  
     Being the second album to ever platinum in its first week, other than Taylor’s Red album two years ago, 1989 has sold over 1,287,000 copies – nearly doubling the anticipated projection of 650,000.  Not a bad way to end the year for someone who reportedly made a cool $64M in 2014.  However, with the massive popularity of music piracy, 1989 could be the last album to ever go platinum.  This time last year, there were already five albums to go platinum.  

     So yeah, you should feel like shit.  An artist’s job is to make music, and music piracy is stripping them of their deserving paychecks.  I’ll admit it, I don’t always buy songs off of iTunes.  In fact, I have a YouTube converter saved right on my bookmarks bar - yeah, I'm a monster.  But if I really like the artist, I’ll throw the $12.00 for an album if I know I'll end up listening to as repetitively as a toddler watching Baby Einstein.  
     Hearing this news has given me a new outlook on how I now grow my music library.  The same guy who would spend $8 on a burrito that he would eat in under six minutes then shit out for fifteen also nearly had a seizure when iTunes bumped their prices from $0.99 to $1.29.   Even if I only wanted one song, I thought this price increase justified me illegally downloading hundreds more.  My thought process was more or less, "A dollar and TWENTY-NINE CENTS to have UNLIMITED ACCESS to my FAVORITE song?!  Now I'm downloading 350 more.  Suck it, iTunes!"  I don't mean to offend you burrito lovers, but it puts into perspective just how financially stingy we’ve become as a society that we continually spend money on things that are essentially laxative-stuffed tortillas, but find trouble in supporting the soundtracks to our lives.  
     The fact that music’s top stars are in jeopardy of not having the opportunity to reach these milestones is just sad.  So with that, I’ll think twice next time I want to download a song for free.  Unless for some odd reason I go on a Beyoncé binge, because then F that - she made $115M this year.  Pay my tuition, B.

Evan Farrar